In the week and a couple of days leading up to my first real channel, I had been working on releasing my attachment to the material. Now, when I say material, I don\u2019t just mean money or cars or house. I also mean, family and friends and how I developed relationships with those material things.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I had started watching this inspirational speaker for CEOs, wanting to build their business and one of the videos was about how we all train people how to treat us and to speak to us. In the video, she tells a story about how she critiques one of her, I believe it\u2019s a vice president, and it just sounded like me. Now over the last nine months I\u2019ve done a lot of inner work and some might say shadow work, and I\u2019ve learned to accept and love all aspects of myself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So in a few short days, I decided to let go of my house, and by let go, I mean no longer fight for it, fight for the equity in it, because I was in a \u201cto-fro\u201d with my lawyer and I found this article on how in some instances of divorce, some would utilize the assets in the divorce to continue to emotionally abuse or control the other spouse. I looked up the law and it has nothing to do with the people or anything to protect either one from abuse and it all has to do with equitable division of the assets.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So somewhere in there, I switched my approach and I stopped asking for permission for what I wanted to do, mind you I\u2019m 40 years old, I have no children and I\u2019ve been paying my way since I left my husband with my short term disability. It hasn\u2019t been easy, but when I realized letting go of the house meant, I would truly be free, my internal growth and my progress skyrocketed. Those that I told what I was feeling and seen, didn\u2019t agree with me, in fact, some thought that I\u2019ve lost it. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now, that I switched how I was behaving. Everyone thought I was being irrational. That I was frustrated. That I was behaving eccentric. When really I was looking at the chains that bound us to unhappiness, to burden. I wasn\u2019t even cursing. I was saying what I wanted. Not asking, no flowery words, and I had never done that in my life. No one knew how to take me. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
My family and my friend were accusing me of using drugs. The few months leading up to this point, I had not been using \u201cdrugs.\u201d I had even stopped taking my Wellbutrin. I see their concern was that I may have slipped into some sort of manic episode. Though my ability to assess that is better as I worked in emergency most of my career.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Rather than react and continue to defend my stance, I took a short break and I did hang out with a friend. And I did imbibe in recreational drug use. Please note that my stance on Drugs (pharmaceutical,alcohol and recreational) is the same, it\u2019s the person and their intent that matters not the substance. I admitted that my addiction was always people and food. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
In that short break something flipped in my brain, and I began to channel for the first time. It took me two days to realize that\u2019s what I was doing. I had a connection to my intuition, to spirit, to God that I\u2019ve never felt before. And it made me look at our reality at what we call family, friends, success, and it made me look at my situation, and when I say it\u2019s a trap, I\u2019m not saying it\u2019s a cage with a door we\u2019ve all walked into. It\u2019s this landscape of slippery slopes and the truth has been edited and manipulated in a way to draw us away from our spiritual path, like a landscape of uneven ground and some paths are solid but they come from \u201crock bottom.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I didn\u2019t get high, but I started to use tarot cards I was moved to buy and not touch again, though I had packed them that day without really knowing why. What I channeled was a taste of what I am to grow into and \u201cNervous System\u201d is what is important. I learned some things about my family that I wouldn\u2019t even know how to handle, what to say, how much to say. I learned some things about my friend and same thing. I guess you would say that my third eye had finally come in. And my claire audience is also starting to as well. My empathy and my claire cognizance have only sharpened. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
When I finally learned a lesson that I was meant to, it took me 2-3 days to piece it together. I took a walk in my neighborhood and I saw a glimpse of how communication in all systems in our reality affects the way we grow, the way we think, the way we view love and success. And then I thought of consent, and what that really means and how there should be balance in that in all areas of life, childhood to adulthood, business, school, etc. To those who may read about history or even know a little bit about the spiritual occult, the idea that popped into my mind was Thoth. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
At first I thought, \u201cwhat if I am crazy,\u201c but then I had a day with my sister, and I can\u2019t explain it; we were in the right place at the right time the whole day, and yesterday was the same for just me. I no longer believe in coincidences but rather a divine plan or map and how we interpret it is our free will.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I plan to write a bit more on my spiritual journey, but am reminded to look at the breadcrumbs I\u2019ve left behind. Check out my Instagram and my YouTube channel. I\u2019ve left some guides there. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Each spiritual path is their own. And I looked within myself. You do the same, I\u2019ll be looking out for you. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In the week and a couple of days leading up to my first real channel, I had been working on releasing my attachment to the material. Now, when I say material, I don\u2019t just mean money or cars or house. I also mean, family and friends and how I developed relationships with those material things. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-40","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blog"],"featured_image_src":null,"featured_image_src_square":null,"author_info":{"display_name":"Matthew Brian","author_link":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/?author=1"},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=40"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/40\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=40"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=40"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.Matthew8Brian.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=40"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}